We Never Celebrate Much. I am Changing That.
Song Of The Week
Ah, “Prom Dress” by mxmtoon—a melodic tapestry woven with threads of nostalgia, heartbreak, and just a dollop of teenage angst. This track is a glorious ode to the bittersweet nature of growing up, encapsulating that awkward moment when life feels more like a dramatic coming-of-age film than a simple school day.
From the first strumming of the ukulele, you’re swept away into a world of vivid memories: fluttering dresses, dreamy dances, and that intricate dance of emotions that often feels like juggling flaming torches (while on a unicycle). Mxmtoon’s ethereal voice is like the gentle breeze that lifts your spirits even as it tells a story of yearning and self-discovery.
The lyrics plunge into the vulnerability of adolescence, where the prom dress symbolizes more than just a fancy garment; it’s a representation of hopes and dreams tangled with the fear of rejection. There’s a raw honesty in those words, painting a picture of the heart’s whims and fancies that everyone can relate to—whether you’ve been to prom or just wore your fanciest outfit to a snack run.
What truly stands out is how mxmtoon crafts an atmosphere of intimacy. It feels like a conversation shared with a best friend over bubble tea—there’s comfort in the confessions and a reminder that even when things get messy, we’re all in this jumbled whirlwind together.
This One’s for my Little Brother
If you’re anything like me, you sometimes see life as half-empty. But then—right when you’re deep in your own head—a thought appears. A brief, almost invisible thought. One that saves you. And then, somehow, that one thought multiplies. Suddenly, what once felt like a hard life starts to feel like a blessed one. That’s how my mind works. It’s strange, I know—but it works every time.
I’m writing this on a plane to San Diego. I dread going every time. I mean, I go maybe four times a year—cut a girl a break! But I can’t help it… my mom lives there. And every time I get on this flight, it’s the same cycle: me, annoyed that I live so far from her. Then I look out the window—a beautiful sunset over my favorite city. What a blessing. The ability to witness that sunset, to travel by myself, to afford a trip like this multiple times a year… and just like that, life feels worth living again.
And before you come for me about harming the environment—hear me out: gas isn’t any better. Plus, my little brother is graduating high school! My little brother, guys. I remember watching my mom’s belly grow every day, and now… 18 years later, he’s no longer a baby. But of course, in my eyes, he always will be. I basically raised him.
This week, my whole family from all over the world is coming together to celebrate his next chapter—his first big milestone. He’s been downplaying it for months, saying things like, “I don’t want to make a big deal out of this,” or, “Everyone graduates—it’s not that special.” But I can’t help feeling overwhelmed with pride, love, and joy for him. And honestly, I hate that we’ve been conditioned to think milestones aren’t worth celebrating unless they’re society-approved “big deals.”
Learning to Celebrate
Where did that belief even come from? Maybe it’s generational—passed down quietly over time. Or maybe it’s our environment. Being poor does that to you. Or maybe it’s the pressure we put on ourselves: to do it all, to conquer everything before we let ourselves feel joy.
How ridiculous is that? To skip the small wins because we haven’t reached the light at the end of the tunnel. To ignore joy just because we still have work to do. To delay celebration because we’re trying to “save it” for something bigger. Delusional, honestly.
And clearly, I’m guilty of all three. I’m known as the one who doesn’t like to plan parties—hell, I barely attend birthday parties. I’ve lost friends over it. And sometimes I wonder… When did I lose my way?
Growing up, we only celebrated birthdays and the big graduations. We were too busy and too broke to throw big bashes. I was always the guest, never the host. My dad would host the occasional domino game night with his coworkers—not exactly the kind of party a teenager looks forward to but, at least, he did it for his community.
But now, as an adult, I want to learn how to rewrite that script. I don’t want to be the girl who skips celebrations just because she didn’t grow up having them. I don’t want to hold my breath until the “real” milestones come. I want to exhale. To laugh. To decorate. To say, “We did it!” even if the win is simply making it through another month, another week, another day. Everyday is a blessing so we have to start acting like it!
Because when I look at my brother, I don’t see just a high school graduate. I see every scraped knee, every yelling match, every after school pick ups. I see the baby I helped raise, the boy who made me a big sister, and now, the young man who's about to step into his own life. If that’s not worth a celebration, I don’t know what is. My brother is graduating!!!
Lately, I’ve been catching myself in the act—pausing before I downplay something good. I’ll stop mid-thought and ask, “Why am I brushing this off?” I used to think feeling proud or excited made me vulnerable, like I had to play it cool or be indifferent to stay in control. But honestly, that mindset hasn’t brought me much peace, rather its’ made me forget easily. That’s the opposite of what I want to do. So now, I’m trying something new. Letting myself feel proud. Letting myself look forward to things. Letting myself get excited about life because it is cool.
It’s slow work, undoing years of subtle shame around joy. But I feel it happening—especially in little moments like this one: on a plane, headed to celebrate someone I love, watching the sky turn orange, feeling grateful to just be here.
And maybe that’s the real point of all of this—learning that joy doesn’t need a reason. That family is a good enough reason. That love, growth, and simply being here are reason enough. Us gathering is a mission already, ones from east coast, Japan, Washington, Taiwan etc.— so I am happy to be with my family this week as we celebrate.
A Soft Landing
This song feels like a soft breakdown—one of those moments where you're supposed to feel happy, but instead you're overwhelmed, tired, or just not in the mood to celebrate. The line “I guess I thought that this would be fun” really hits, especially when I think about how many milestones I’ve downplayed or avoided. It reminds me that it’s okay to not always feel the way you’re “supposed to.” And more importantly, that there’s still beauty in showing up—messy feelings and all.
But this song reminds me that I’m not alone in that disconnect. That other people feel overwhelmed by celebration too. That even when we’re in a room full of glitter and good intentions, we can still feel unsure, out of place, or like we’re just surviving the moment instead of soaking it in.
And yet, even in all of that sadness, “prom dress” by Mxmtoon is also about learning to be honest. Honest about how we feel, honest about what we need, and honest enough to say, “This isn’t perfect—and that’s okay.” It’s kind of what this whole post is about, too. Learning to stop expecting joy to look one way. Letting life be messy, weird, emotional, quiet, beautiful. Letting the small moments count. Even if you're crying in a prom dress. Even if you’re smiling on a plane. Even if you’re still figuring it all out.
Enjoy This Journey With Me
° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 °
Enjoy This Journey With Me ° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 °
This isn’t the end—just a bookmark in the conversation. Stories don’t really close; they unfold, shift, and find new voices. If this one stirred something in you, let it breathe. Leave a thought, challenge an idea, or carry it forward in your own way. And if you ever feel like wandering through more unfinished thoughts, you know where to find me. Let’s keep the conversation alive. ~XOXO
